Frying up Heart Disease and Corny Dogs
Yes, it’s that time of year again. The Texas State Fair rolled into town this week with such culinary delights as chicken fried bacon, fried banana splits, fried grilled cheese sandwiches, Texas fried jelly bellys, deep fried s’mores, and fried chocolate truffles. After 2 decades of passive indifference and active taunting of friends who gleefully skip down the fairway and listen to Big Tex shout greetings after them year after year; I was dragged, kicking and screaming, by my coworkers to the iron gates of the State Fair under the guise of "team-building" and departmental togetherness. I trudged along the fairway as my colleagues suckled on the thighs of turkeys cut down in their prime to make possible the drumsticks that slid down their gullets. I attempted not to vomit when my boss insisted that I ride the ferris wheel with him where he then preceded to rock the tiny 4x4 coffin back and forth as I struggled not to think about us falling to our impending death on the pavement below.
That was two years ago. I still can not erase the impressions of pig races and corny dog contests from my mind. It’s as though the horrific images are seared into the deepest crevices of my cranium where I can only hope that one day old age and perhaps dementia will take these sordid memories and leave in their place prettier memories of the time that I dated Brad Pitt.
What? It’s my memories- I can replace them with anything I want! I did have to cut Brad loose after all, he got too needy and clingy- it wasn’t pretty- I had George, Clooney that is, pick up the pieces, he’s good at that you know, but I digress…
HA! Oh, my gosh. Funny. I remember the first time I brought my husband to the Illinois State Fair (a tradition when we were kids but now a gross spectacle), and all he could do was gawk. “Why is everyone obese”? Your description of eating the turkey leg is genius. I do, however, have fond memories of the hot dogs cooked in onions and peppers. And then deep-fried, of course.
Comment by JD at I Do Things — October 4, 2008 @ 4:17 pm
And the truly horrendous part of the story is that I recently learned that my work is FORCING me to return to “rebuild the team” as though our exercise two years ago has not scarred me for life. Is there no end to the madness!?! Though I am comforted in knowing it will make for excellent blog fodder…
Comment by singulargirl — October 5, 2008 @ 10:21 am