Apparently my carrier pigeon only has one wing
I am waiting on important news. I did manage to finally stop trading phone calls with the very important person and now I am simply waiting on a carrier pigeon to bring me very important information via the USPS. However, the carrier pigeon who left on Friday was clearly waylaid by a grackle that left the pigeon incapacitated and therefore must have resorted to walking my very important information the 1,000 miles cross-country. Otherwise, I have no other explanation for why the USPS is SO SLOW. Or why I am so impatient. Maybe if I continue to twiddle my thumbs and breathe heavily with an air of impatience the USPS will speed up their service. Or maybe they will find this blog, some how trace it to me and my single piece of mail, and decide to shred my mail on principle. That would be just my luck.
